Brown Sectioned - another Daily Mash cracker

From the Daily Mash - absolutely class

BROWN SECTIONED

Mr Brown was admitted to a secure unit and will undergo tests later today

PRIME minister Gordon Brown was last night under observation in a London psychiatric hospital after claiming to be Spiderman.

Mr Brown told the Commons that he had 'vanquished' both Doctor Octopus and the Green Goblin through a combination of superhuman agility and a strange 'sixth sense' he acquired after being bitten by an irradiated spider.

He added: "I can also swing between skyscrapers and I'm very good at science. Have you guessed who I am yet?"

As Commons security staff moved towards him, the prime minister ran from the chamber, throwing his briefing notes in the air and removing his shirt and tie.

Mr Brown was finally captured when he attempted to scale the outside of the Palace of Westminster before falling and twisting his knee.

As he was handcuffed and helped into the back of an ambulance he shouted: "You have bound my hands because you are scared I will use one of my sticky webs!"

A Downing Street source said: "The weird thing is that sometimes he would claim to be Doctor Octopus and make all these terrible decisions and then he'd say, 'only Spiderman can stop me'. And then he'd wink at us."

The source added: "Spiderman was just one of his incarnations. For much of July he thought he was either Dangermouse or Count Duckula."

A police spokesman said last night: "A 57 year-old man from Central London was this evening taken into protective custody under section 4 of the Mental Health Act."